by G. E. Uke, Reporter,

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is…how do I put this…a bunch of old actors (and two newer ones) getting together to reprise their glory days and have fun creating a totally goofy movie together. So the question is: are you the sort of person who likes to watch that? In this reviewer’s opinion, you should be. It’s nice to watch them hamming it up, and their fun is infectious.

You’ve got Michael Keaton playing the most oddball character he’s ever played (Beetlejuice), Winona Ryder returning as the awkward nerdy goth-girl Lydia Deetz with adult mom problems, Monica Bellucci doing her evil Latina seductress thing (and she CRUSHES it like a sponge despite being 60 years old), and Willem Dafoe playing a cornball version of his old detective from Boondocks Saints. Catherine O’Hara delights in her role as the absurdly artistic Delia Deetz, and Burn Gorman is a stupendously funny priest. Even Danny DeVito emerged from the woodwork to make a cameo. 

Yes, it’s true that we also see Jenna Ortega (Wednesday Adams) and Arthur Conti (House of the Dragon) added to the mix. Their performances are good, but the movie mainly focuses on letting the old timers smash the audience with loads of macabre visuals and ridiculous antics. That’s what Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is *about*, and they lean into it so hard they fall off the ledge. 

What I’m trying to say is, if you walk into this movie expecting an ironclad plot and deep character development you’re probably the sort of person who goes into a McDonald’s and throws a fit because they don’t have foie gras. Which means that I can’t help you.  

The movie did have some pacing flaws, however. Several parts felt rushed, the “villain” (if you can call him that) dies with zero preamble or gravitas, and the ending was extremely abrupt. There are a lot of “where the hell did that come from” moments, but the original Beetlejuice was like that too so they were faithful to the franchise. This film plays to the sensibilities of its predecessor and doesn’t try to be anything more or less. If it did, it probably wouldn’t be Beetlejuice. My only true gripe, if you can call it that, is that Monica Bellucci didn’t seem to actually have any purpose in the plot. She doesn’t even run into the rest of the characters until right at the end, and their interaction is like two minutes long tops. It almost feels like they only tossed her in there because she’s hot (and 60, yeah, I said it) and they wanted to see her go full-on Elvira and roam around sucking people’s souls up with her full pouting grandma lips. And you know what? I’m absolutely fine with that. Monica is up there with Cameron Diaz in the pantheon of classy ladies who will always be awesome no matter how old they get. The Brothers Grimm taught me this. 

Rating:
Going too deep into the plot would be a disservice to readers because there are some twists and turns in this movie that need to be experienced to be properly understood, so I will simply give Beetlejuice Beetlejuice 4 out of 5 stars and urge you all to go see it. The last star I am withholding because of some janky plot elements that didn’t quite match up, but only because I think they could have done so if they’d tried. 

Now excuse me, I need to head over to McDonald’s for some foie gras. 

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